Week 3 Story: The One That Got Away
Hey guys, there's an updated version of this story on my portfolio! Link
Once upon a time, there was a princess named Sita, who was so gorgeous and elegant. She was the wife of a very handsome, strong, and kind hearted man named Rama. Rama and Sita were so in love with each other that they would die for one another. Rama always wanted the best for his love and gave her anything she asked for. Rama built her a castle with a beautiful garden surrounding the whole place. Right behind their castle was also a dark and ambiguous forest. They never go into that area because there were usually rakshas, who are demons.
Once upon a time, there was a princess named Sita, who was so gorgeous and elegant. She was the wife of a very handsome, strong, and kind hearted man named Rama. Rama and Sita were so in love with each other that they would die for one another. Rama always wanted the best for his love and gave her anything she asked for. Rama built her a castle with a beautiful garden surrounding the whole place. Right behind their castle was also a dark and ambiguous forest. They never go into that area because there were usually rakshas, who are demons.
As Sita was walking around in her garden, she saw something in the distant. She couldn’t believe her eyes. It was the most magnificent
creature she has ever seen, a golden deer. She yelled for Rama and his brother,
Lakshmana, and told them that she wanted Rama to capture the golden deer. Rama
then went to get the creature for his wife. After a while, Sita gets a feeling
that Rama is in trouble. She insists Lakshmana to go and find him. She starts
to cry because she knows that Rama is her everything and without him she’ll
die. Lakshmana went after him because he too could sense something was odd
about this situation. He knew there are some evil people after his family.
On her balcony alone, Sita sat crying and praying that her
Rama comes back to her. She was so sad and upset at herself that she sent Rama
after the golden deer. It would kill her if anything happened to Rama. As she
was sitting on her balcony, there was a man in her garden. Sita didn’t notice
him at first. This man was no other than the King of Lanka, Ravana. However, he
disguised himself as an wise old man, trying to get close to Sita. He had his
eyes on Sita for a while now. He has never seen someone as beautiful as Sita
and wanted her to become his wife.
Sita notices that there was an old man standing in her
garden. He calls for her to come down. At first Sita was a little suspicious,
but she went down and thought he was just a harmless man. The wise old man asks
Sita why she was crying. Sita tells him about her husband and the situation.
After hearing her talk about Rama, the old man shows his true identity as
Ravana, who also had ten heads, because he was mad that she still has feelings
for Rama. Ravana tell Sita to come with him to be his wife, and that he is
better man than Rama.
Ravana revealing his true self to Sita (Source: Wikimedia Commons) |
However, Sita tells him no that she is forever committed to
Rama her true love. Hearing this obviously made Ravana more mad. He grabs Sita
and places her in his chariot. The entire time Sita is yelling for Rama to come
save her. Lucky for Sita, Rama was nearby with his brother Lakshmana.
Rama and Lakshmana were making their way back to the castle
when they hear a faint sound. Rama stopped in his tracks to hear the sound more
closely. Lakshmana asked his brother what was wrong. Rama looked at his brother
and told him that Sita was in trouble. They ran towards the castle, in which
they saw Ravana trying to take Sita. They take quick action to stop Ravana. Rama
goes after Ravana, while Lakshmana helps Sita get out of the chariot. Rama manages
to wound Ravana. Mad that Sita got away, Ravana leaves and threatens Rama that
he’ll be back to take his revenge.
At last, Rama and Sita are finally reunited. She was so
thankful that Rama was safe and both men were nearby to save her. However, she
was still worried that Ravana will try to come back to take his vengeance. Rama
told Sita not to worry and that next time they’ll be better prepared. They all
were just happy that no one was hurt and Sita got her Rama back.
Author's Note: This story is based on a public domain edition of Ramayana of The Golden Deer and Ravana and Sita. In those stories, Ravana comes up with a plan to take Sita. A orders a raksha to take the form of a golden deer, so that could lure away Rama and his brother that way Sita is left unguarded. Then Ravana will take the disguise of a wise man and abduct Sita. However in that version, Ravana was successful in kidnapping Sita. I changed the ending to where he was not successful. Another thing I changed was the setting of my story to them in the castle. In the original version, Sita was staying in a forest.
Bibliography:
PDE Ramayana: The Golden Deer by Donald A. Mackenzie and Romesh Dutt. Web source.
PDE Ramayana: Ravana and Sita by Donald A. Mackenzie and Romesh Dutt. Web source.
Hi Jesika,
ReplyDeleteI really like your story and the way you have told it. You have really great detail for your story. It really helps getting into the story with such great detail. The way you described the love between Rama and Sita is great and it is constantly in the story. The changing up the setting puts a different perceptive on the story.
Hi Jesika,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading your story. Your format is nice and I like the colors of your blog, the theme is calming and the font isn't hard to read. I enjoyed your abbreviated version of Rama and Sita's journey. I also like the story elements that you changed. Your language is succinct and clear. Your writing style helped present a clear story. This is a great feature of your story compared to the wistful writing styles of the online version of the Ramayana. I'm happy that you gave Sita and Rama their happy ending. I hate how it ends in the actual story. Overall, I think you did a great job. My only suggestion is adding a bit of context to your author's note. I really enjoyed the changes you made and you did a great job highlighting them, but I wanted to know why you made those changes. Great job and I look forward to reading more!
Hi Jesika,
ReplyDeleteI think you do a great job of showing the love that Rama and Sita have for eachother, which really sets up well within the Ramayana. I also think that this story is much happier ending than the original, and it's great to see that Rama was able to defeat Ravana without needing Hanuman to burn down an entire city!